Sunday Scaries

Photo by Annie Spratt

Good morning! It’s coffee time & a case of the Sunday scaries!

Those feelings of intense anxiety and dread that routinely occur every Sunday.

Often starting in the late afternoon and continue into the evening.

A form of anticipatory anxiety, the Sunday scaries involves nervousness and dread about something that hasn't happened yet: the week ahead.

If you try to ignore it, it just seems to get worse.

Or you try to stay busy to keep it at bay.

But the scaries tend to creep & seep back into your day.

Sometimes it feels unmanageable.

What to do?

1. Call it out for what it is: it’s just the Sunday scaries, nothing to worry about right now.

2. Take action by focusing on the here-and-now by engaging in activities that energize you. Go for a swim, play pickle ball, read a good book.

3. Stay mindful by engaging the power of observation.

Visual: observe what you see; notice colors, shapes, patterns, & texture.

Auditory: observe what you hear, the sounds of birds, the wind in the trees, the hum of the AC.

Olfactory: notice any smells, fresh cut grass, blooming jasmine, unidentifiable smells.

Somatosensory: notice any touch sensations, temperature fluctuations on your skin, the pressure of the chair your sitting on, feet firmly grounded to the earth, or the object’s details you’re currently holding in your hand.

4. Write 3 actions you will take TOMORROW for a successful week, stick it on your computer, now go back to enjoying your Sunday.

You deserve it!

Quick Tips to Cope with Fear and Anxiety

Photo by Patrick Mueller

Cultivate an attitude of gratitude

Every morning, run through at least 10 things you are grateful for, it could be gratitude for your loved ones, gratitude for being in good health, gratitude for having a roof over your head, gratitude for the sun, the clouds, the sea.

FEAR is False Evidence Appearing Real

Refuse to accept fear at face value. Because of your fight-or-flight mechanism, your brain is trying to trick you into behaving as if there’s a very large & ferocious lion in the room. It’s false! Remember that! You choose how you want to react to it.

Repeat Roosevelt’s famous quote, “The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.”

If you have an anxiety reaction, then take action

If you are experiencing fear/anxiety symptoms, scale the fear/anxiety on a 10 point scale, with 10 being super anxious; then decide to take action to decrease the number on the scale. For example, you feel tension in your neck, and you scale it at a 7. Decide you are going to go on a walk to decrease the tension from a 7 to a 5. Go on that walk while taking in slow, deep breaths and slowly breathing out. Imagine the scale going down from 7 as you relax through it. You can do even simple actions, such as getting a glass of water, meditating, doing some deep breathing exercises. You got this. You can do it!

Have faith at all times!

Faith can be spiritually based, but it is also cultivating a firm belief that things will turn out OK: Faith that you will get better; faith that you will conquer this thing; faith that you are a good & lovable person; faith that despite the fear/anxiety symptoms, you got this, you know what to do, you take action and beat this thing.

Self-affirm

There are a number of great self-affirmations that can be repeated out loud or to yourself to help you through an anxiety episode. For example: Despite my anxiety, I know I am doing the best I can; despite my anxiety, I will persevere & conquer this thing no matter what; the anxiety does not define me, me the capable, successful, wonderful person.

Always be mindful!

Stay present-centered in your thoughts by focusing on the here-and-now. For example, what do you see in the room? What color is it? What shape is it? Is it hard or soft? Imagine it if it were a different color or shape. Imagine your favorite person sitting on it. When you take a walk, notice all the trees, the color, shapes, sizes, smell. Do that with the clouds and all you observe while walking. Don’t forget to breathe!

Coping With Stress and Anxiety During The Pandemic

Photo by Nik Shuliahin

Minimize News and Social Media coverage of the pandemic.

Spending not more than an hour watching the coverage of the pandemic minimizes negative effects of too much news or media.

Accept all feelings you’re having.

There are no right or wrong feelings. You may be experiencing grief, anxiety, irritability, hopelessness, and loneliness. All feelings are valid. Give yourself permission to feel whatever you’re feeling. Acknowledge your feelings as valid no matter how outrageous you may think they are. It’s OK to not be OK right now. What’s important is that you express these feelings to others who care about you.

Keep a schedule and stick to it, especially if you have children.

Schedules structure our day and give us a sense of control, especially if we are stressed out. Children respond well to schedules and structure. Families are in better harmony with schedules.

Include physical exercise on a regular basis.

Exercise is an important part of overall physical and mental health. Do an activity you enjoy, be it walking, gardening, watching a work-out video. The internet has a lot to offer in the form of dance, structured classes and yoga.

Include self-care activities that you enjoy, and those you can do with your family.

Think about the hobbies you currently enjoy or those you want to cultivate. Maybe you play a musical instrument or used to. Now’s a good time to engage in these activities.

Keep faith alive. Whatever your faith, be it religious or spiritual, allow a place for it in your life.

Faith can be a reminder that despite this very difficult time, things will eventually get better. Faith is a solid belief that despite any hardship you are facing, you will step-up and be successful.

Engage in stress management techniques.

Meditation, visualization, deep breathing, and mindfulness are a few ways to keep yourself calm and centered. When we remain calm and centered, we are better able to cope with the ongoing challenges brought by this pandemic.

Get help when you need it.

There are many resources for you if you need to reach out for help. Don’t suffer needlessly. Get help if you need it.

Paul Inglizian, LCSW is a compassionate, supportive therapist who provides individual, couple and family therapy via telehealth. He also provides coaching to help you change your focus, develop new coping skills, & achieve success. For more information, see https:// hopecoastcounseling.com