Self-Care in these Hectic Holiday Times
The hustle and bustle of the holidays. And right around the corner, a new year 2020!
For a lot of people, the holidays can be full of joy and good cheer as they celebrate with family and friends. However, for others, especially individuals who have experienced trauma in their lives, the holidays can be wrought with anxiety, discomfort, and fear due to a number of factors: events, toxic family members, or holiday rituals that may trigger the individual to re-experience intense feelings.
Check out the following suggestions on how to cope with negative feelings the holidays may evoke in you.
Cultivate an attitude of gratitude.
Cultivating an attitude of gratitude tends to soften the effects of anxiety and fear.
Every morning, try to run through at least 10 things you are grateful for. For example, it could be gratitude for your family, gratitude for being in good health, gratitude for having a roof over your head, gratitude for the sun, the clouds, and the sea.
If you experience fear or anxiety, then take action.
Remember your symptoms of fear or anxiety are usually historical fears that are currently being triggered by someone or something in your immediate environment. Consciously refuse to accept fear or anxiety at face value. Remind yourself that it’s the nature of trauma to raise its ugly head, and that you choose how you want to react to it.
Tip: Scale the fear/anxiety on a 10 point scale, with 10 being super fearful or anxious; then decide to take action to decrease the number on the scale. For example, if you feel tension in your jaw, and you scale it at a 7. Decide you are going to go on a short walk to decrease the tension from a 7 to a 5. Go on that walk. Don't forget to breathe!
Have faith at all times.
Faith is not only religious, but it’s also a positive belief in yourself and your success. Faith that you will get through this. Faith that you will feel better. Faith that you will conquer whatever negative symptoms you are experiencing. Faith that you are a good & lovable person.
Always have faith that despite this upsurge of negative feelings, you got this, you know what to do, you take action & succeed!
Self-affirm.
Self-affirmations are positive statements that you say aloud or to yourself that motivates you towards success. Try these!
Despite my fear or anxiety, I know I am doing the best I can.
Despite this overwhelming vicarious trauma, I will persevere & conquer this thing no matter what.
The fear or anxiety does not define me, me the capable, successful, wonderful person.
Always be mindful.
By staying present-centered in your thoughts by focusing on the here-and-now lessens the effects of fear and anxiety. Be aware of your own negative thoughts and any body tensions you may be experiencing. Take action by challenging or reframing negative thoughts and consciously relaxing or releasing any tension you may be experiencing.
As a mindful exercise, what do you see in the room? What color is it? What shape is it? Is it hard or soft? Imagine it if it were a different color or shape. Imagine your favorite person sitting on it. When you take a walk, notice all the trees, the color, shapes, sizes, and smells, for example.
You may not be able to alleviate all the fear and anxiety you experience, but these few techniques mentioned above will provide you with a strategy to positively cope.
Sometimes just knowing you have a strategy for coping if you hit a rough patch during the family dinner, for example, brings a degree of comfort and a sense of control that will help you through the experience and even find joy.